Tag Archives: urban dictionary

“Everything will be sophisticated except to the extent that it sounds like a broken retard talking to you”

“William Shatner is like one of those self-inflatable things on an airplane. If the ‘80s crashed then William Shatner flew out of it and is saving lives by inflating himself. Slowly. And automatically.”

“There’s no laws against hitting your emotions”

“I have to doodies peepees”

“The only reason I get up out of bed is to be unreasonable”

“We know about the birds and the bees, but then no one ever explains separately birds and bees.”

“I feel exquisitely blessed and fabulous”

“Cause you’re the kind of person who’s out at the intersection of Nature and Nurture in the middle of a Tuesday, buying one pack of smokes with mostly change. One of the bills was wet. Just one of them.”

“Let’s get all the bitches straight!”

“Does that beard come with automatic windows?”