“I’m not just ready… I was BORN premature.”

“A moose dressed as a mountie smoking a cigarette of maple leaves”

“This is a rabbit hole you can really sink your face into”

“Hillary Clinton does the same thing Trump does just it takes longer and with lady parts”

“I was lead to believe there would be hoes”

“In a weird way taking ownership wasn’t taking ownership. That possessive apostrophe was apocryphal.”