“Pluto is tired of our mixed signals; both television broadcast and emotional connections to its existence.”

“It’s like asbestos mixed with blackness. Asblactos.”

“If you keep letting your jeans frey then eventually they’re gonna turn into jorts. And then junderwear.”

“I like the white noise, and the black noise, and especially the Latin noise. It’s quite nice.”

“I just wanna sit here and cave in my prostate for another 200 years. Mash it like a diamond. Into prostate cancer.”

“I deprecated my junderwear”

“There’s a lot of waisted time here in this conversation about sag and muffin tops and mom jeans”

“That’s nature. For every hot person there’s nine tragedies.”

“I always think about the sad parts so imagine how many miniature pigs that man kicked before his spree was brought to an end.”

“Send them into snowman’s land and see how they weather”