“Is this what YouTube is now? Your tube?”

“Could more people identify as craftsmen? As blacksmiths? Or professional bowlers?”

“What are these, are these thoughts? Oh no! I didn’t mean to put these thoughts on the joke fire!”

“I’m gonna kill one funny bird with one gigantic boulder just to prove a point. I don’t need to kill a whole bunch of birds using one stone. I have all bird corpses and skipping stones that I need.”

“Life: It turns tiny little cherubs into haggard roadies.”

“A big, black trash bag of depression with a bunch of shredded up humor inside of it… but it’s evidence that we don’t want people to see.”

“The Dumpster of Solitude”